Olympic News and Notes
Olympics Underway
McGuire hosts opening night
The 2006 Summer Olympics began last night with the start of three tournaments in Rob
McGuire's basements. Mario Soccer, 8-Ball pool, and FIFA 06 all got off to good starts. For recaps and scores
of the matches, see the sports page. (5/20)
Tournament Brackets Posted
Seven Events Officially "Bracketed"
The buildup to the Olympic Games continues with the completion of brackets for seven
Olympic events. The events (Tennis 1v1, 2v2, Ping-Pong, 8-Ball, 69 Darts, Paper Football, and Guitar Hero) are now all
set to begin tournament play. There will not be a delay to wait for Mr. Jaesung Lee to return to the States nor will
there be a delay to wait for Bunker to hold the opening cermonies cookout.
Events that feature pool play will be completed by the end of the week. (5/17)
Lee Demands Top Seed
Korean To Be Number 1 Seed
An event once in danger is now poised to begin with a controversial number one seed.
Jaesung Lee, via IM from Belgium, demanded to be seeded Number One in the field based on his baseball
playing overseas. As there are no clear cut favorites in the tournament, Lee was granted the honor on Sunday night.
When asked to comment, Mr. Lee replied intelligently declared, "Bitches, I got more varsity experience
than most of you guys combined, multiplied by two. Asians are on the rise in the sport of baseball. I've
packed on ten pounds of muscle since you twinkies last saw me."
Surely, these words will seem ridiculous when Lee fails to put one out of the infield. But for
now, the Number One seed is confident and the once-endagered Home Run Derby is showing signs of life. (5/14)
Tournament Formats Determined
The picture for a variety of Olympic tournaments is slowly starting to take shape. Over the
weekend, a majority of tournament formats were proposed and are close to being finalized. For many of these competitions,
the draw for tournament play will be conducted this week during each Period 2 AP Spanish class.
The following is a full list of the Olympics, with the proposed formats listed:
Mario Soccer 1v1: Pool Play/KO Round
Mario Soccer 2v2: Pool Play/KO Round
FIFA 06: Pool Play/KO Round
Bitch Slap: Double Elimination
8-Ball Pool: Single Elimination, Best of Three
Ping-Pong: Double Elimination
Gockey: TBD
Mario Party: Three Rounds
Guitar Hero: Single Elimination
Madden 06: Pool Play/KO Round
Wiffleball: Double Elimination
Tennis 1v1: Single Elimination
Tennis 2v2: Single Elimination
Mini-Golf: Two Rounds
Paper Football: Double Elimination
Whiplash: TBD
Ultimate Frisbee: Double Elimination
Home Run Derby: Top Score
Croquet: TBD
69 Darts: Double Elimination
NHL 06: Pool Play/KO Round
Old News
Opening Ceremony Announced
Date TBD
The opening ceremonies for the 2006 Norwood Summer Olympics will take place after graduation.
So far, the only detail to be finalized is the location. The opening ceremony cookout will take place at Nick Bunker's
house on a random date that is inconvenient to him. The event will feature an irate Bunker as well as a large faced
Korean running down Railroad Avenue with an Olympic torch. Once the date is finalized it will be posted on this website.
